Burn - Tina Arena

Tiba2 menangis dong denger lagu ini ... Inget Diaz ...

"Burn"

Do you wanna be a poet and write

Do you wanna be an actor up in lights

Do you wanna be a soldier and fight for love

Do you wanna travel the world

Do you wanna be a diver for pearls

Or climb a mountain and touch the clouds above

Be anyone you want to be

Bring to life your fantasies

But I want something in return

I want you to burn, burn for me baby

Like a candle in my night

Oh burn

Burn for me

Burn for me

Are you gonna be a gambler and deal

Are you gonna be a doctor and heal

Or go to heaven and touch God's face

Are you gonna be a dreamer who sleeps

Are you gonna be a sinner who weeps

Or an angel

Under grace

Ill lay down on your bed of coals

Offer up my heart and soul

But in return

I want you to burn

Burn for me baby

Like a candle in my night

Oh burn burn for me burn for me

Yeah

Ooh

I want you to burn baby ooh

Laugh for me

Cry for me

Pray for me

Lie for me

Live for me

Die for me

I want you to burn

Burn for me baby

Like a candle in my night

Oh burn burn for me burn for me

Yeah

Ah yeah

I want you to burn

I want you to burn for me baby

Ohh yeah

Gara-gara ada yg curhat di meja sebelah

lagi mikir ... there are some people who would like to be in my position right now ... or at least, enjoy doing what i am currently working now ... but then again, me, the one in the position, can't feel what they are feeling ... kenapa ya? i never thought that i belong here ... gosh ... i don't know why ... it's not that i don't feel grateful or anything, but just ...

mungkin terkait sama apa yg lg terjadi di kantor ... serikat pekerja lg heboh2nya menuntut haknya ... kita yg di dalem pd pengen keluar, atau paling nggak, ada perubahan sistem yg bisa menguntungkan kedua pihak ... sementara yg di luar pd pengen masuk, mungkin karena tergiur janji2 surga yg diumbar ... yakin mo masuk?

but then again, kembali ke pribadi masing2 ... ada yg merasa memang "jiwa"nya tu udah ada di sini, "this is me", they said, "this is my world", they said ... am i be able to say that confidently? i don't think so ... not at this moment, at least ...

gimana sih, udah umur segini kok msh aja blm menemukan jati diri? caelah ... eh tapi, emang ada batesan umur ya buat nemuin what you love the most? what drives you to wake up every morning and be yourself and do things passionately? harusnya (or, kayaknya) enggak ya ...

ga ngerti ... again, for a moment in life, i am in an intersection ... which path i should take? what kind of decision i should make? dan jawabannya lagi2 ... dear God, help me ...

Jalan2 ke Amrik (day 5)

udah hari ke-5 ya ... hmm ... mo bilang ga kerasa, kayanya kerasa deh, banget malah ... ga bisa tidur lagi dong ... pagi2 kebangun nangis sendiri ... homesick, bo! heuheu ... kalo inget, jadi malu ... but anyway, msh ada last day of the conference ni ... jadi, ya berangkatlah kita pagi2 ... eh tapi sebelumnya breakfast dulu deng di hotel, abisan gak kenyang ama sarapan di tempat conference, apaan, cuman fresh fruit sama assorted pastries gitu ... perut indonesia niii ... or maybe particularly me kali ya, yg ga bisa dimasukin makanan manis2 kalo pagi2 ...

after breakfast, we had a nice walk to the conference hotel, and as usual, a cup of starbuck's decaf coffee in hand (yum!), we began this last day of the conference with a keynote speech ...

and with no closure of the conference, we decided to take a trip to the local mall by ourselves, using the bus, of course! after asking around for direction, we went straight to the so-called mall that is the closest from the downtown area ...

selama perjalanan ini, ngelewatin komplek2 perumahan yang ... wow ... so ... foreign-like ... (i was going to use the word "spectacular" or "amazing", but i don't think those can be used for housing) ... sebenernya ga terlalu aneh sih kalo diliat dari model2 rumahnya, cuman, apa ya ... so neat ... so clustered ... with no fences on each houses ... sangat sangat homy ... the neighborhood ... so peaceful ... (from the look on the outside sih ...) maybe the weather also contributed to this scenery ... the cold winter day ... i wish i had pictures of this ...

setelah sampai di mall, liat2 dikit, eh kok laper ya? ya sud, makan dulu aja ... cheese burgers ... hmmm ... enaaak! perut kenyang, lancar deh liat2nya ... yaa, it was a typical mall like we have it in here ... cuman yg menyenangkan adalah, lg pd diskon! woohoo ...! langsung deh kita memuaskan diri melihat2 ...

tapi ga bisa semaunya juga sih window shopping-nya, list titipan msh numpuk soalnya ... jadi sebelum malem, kita cabut dari mal (tanpa beli apa2, yg ternyata turned out to be an advantage later on), kita ke bookstore di tempat lain utk beli titipan buku2 ... naik bis lagi lah kita ... nyampe di toko buku udah malem, mana ga tau di mana turunnya bis, nanya2 ama orang, dikasih tau jalannya pake motong2 taman segala lagi, gelap, dingin, basah pula kaki, sebenernya udah capek banget, tapi dipaksain aja jalan sampe ke toko bukunya itu ...

fiuh ... akhirnya sampe juga di borders ... and as i expected, great place to explore ... sayang lg ga kepingin beli2 buat sendiri selain buat titipan, jadi ya nyari2 titipan lah judulnya ... setelah dpt apa yg dicari, dan setelah puas liat2, kita putusin utk pulang ke hotel naik taksi aja, soalnya udah terlalu malem utk jadwal bis, ga ada yg lewat lagi jam segitu ... tapi sebelumnya beli dinner dulu sih ... wendy's ... original wendy's of usa ... hmmm ... enaaak ...!

Jalan2 ke Amrik (day 4)

hari sabtu ni ... fiuh ... lumayan lah, after having a better sleep than the nights before, bangun lumayan seger ... keluar hotel pagi2 ni ... dgn niat mo breakfast di conference aja, sambil ga mo rugi juga, kan udah bayar, sayang kalo ga dimanfaatin ...

sampe di tempat conference, sama kayak kemaren, starbucks free flow lhooo ... woohoo ...! dgn perasaan lbh tenang (krn presentasinya udah kemaren), kita jalan2 doang di dlm hotelnya ... haha hihi dikit sama yg laen, dengerin keynote sama pillar/ featured speech ... ampe makan siang deh ... ternyata eh ternyata, menu siang itu pork dong, untung waiters-nya nanya2 dulu, sambil nyaranin menu vegetarian aja, ya sudahlah akhirnya makan tomat, bakar, kentang bakar, timun bakar, asparagus bakar, beuuh ... berasa kelinci aja nih ... dan yg nyebelinnya ternyata ada menu chicken yg boleh jadi option kalo ga mau vegetarian ... bengong langsung liat yg makan ayam ...

after lunch, kita mutusin utk cabut, jalan2, sightseeing, mumpung dikasih tiket gratis ke galeri setempat ... which turned out to be ... awesome ...!!! gile, keren bener ni galeri! untungnya lagi, galerinya ada persis di depan hotel tempat kita nginep sekarang ... woohoo ...! lumayaaan ...

abis dari galeri, mampir hotel dulu bentar, isho tanpa ma, soalnya udah tadi di conference ma-nya mah ... kita cabut lagi ... destination: downtown, baby ...! toko2 yg dari kemaren udah diincer buat kita masukin, langsung dijabanin satu2, termasuk titipan2 dari kampung, langsung dicariin semua wkt itu ...

untung juga sih, hotel conference-nya ada di daerah downtown, jadi pas makan malem, dg alasan azas manfaat, kita balik lagi ke tempat conference cuman buat ngikut dinner doang, sambil ransel udah penuh banget sama bawaan oleh2 ... heuheu ...

after that, with a full stomach, we went back to the hotel, fell asleep right away ...!

Jalan2 ke Amrik (day 3)

i can't really sleep, actually, i don't know why ... maybe it was because the gloomy atmosphere of the hotel, or the fact that the balconies are connected to each other, or this is the first time for me being this far from my family ... i don't know ... i just couldn't sleep ... but suddenly, i heard my roommate screamed, i jumped right up to see her ... gila, di bantalnya udah banyak noda2 darah gitu dong ... taunya banyak banget sejenis serangga, atau kutu? ga tau juga, pokoknya udah banyak banget yg dipencetin di atas bantalnya gitu ... hiiihhh!!! whuaaa ngeri banget ...! reaksi pertama, bengong ... tapi kemudian, hiiihhh!!! merinding! let's move out ...!!!

sebenernya sempet ngeliat juga sih di bantalku ada 1-2 biji kaya gituan, tapi ah sudahlah, kemaren2 mana mikir, udah kaburu capek duluan ... tapi kalo kaya gini sih ... again, hiiihhh ...!

tapi kepikiran juga, hari ini kan manggung, mana presentasi blm beres lagi, hmmm gimana ya ... gitu pikiran miss IRM ... aku ga boleh keliatan panik, ntar dia panik juga lagi, tapi pokoknya we've got to get out of here fast!!! (kalo menurut aku mah ...) untungnya dia sependapat ... akhirnya diputusin, setelah beres manggung, kita jalan cari hotel lain, a better one of course, with a chance of more expensive ... gapapalah, asal ga dikerubutin kutu lagi ... hiiihhh ...!

sampe di conference, beres2 presentasi ... manggung deh miss IRM ... alhamdulillah lancaaarrr ... hehe, congrats ya ...! tanpa nengok2 ke sesi paralel yg lain, kita langsung cabut nyari2 hotel yg lain, yg lbh deket sama tempat conference (sebenernya udah coba booking di hotel conference-nya sendiri, cuman udah full) ... dg kemungkinan lbh mahal (pastinya) ... akhirnya dpt juga yg deket banget, dg harga 2x lipat hotel yg lama, tp jauh lbh bersih, & reliable tentunya ... fiuh, alhamdulillah ... langsung cek in!

abis itu balik lg ke hotel semula, cek out ... yg ternyata udah fully paid di muka, sebelum nginep juga udah dilunasin, katanya ... ga bisa dipotong sesuai hari kita nginep aja ... yaaahhh, bete banget ... gak akan gue balik2 lagi nginep di sini! (dlm hati) ... tapi ya sudahlah, daripada ngalamin yg kaya kemaren lagi ... cabutlah kita dari situ, setelah setengah ngomel2 ama resepsionisnya ttg kondisi kamar yg ga "bersih" ... (sempet kepikir sih, kan hotelnya katanya tu "pet friendly" ya, jangan2 itu kutu2 asalnya dari pets yg ikut nginep di situ ...? hiiihhh ...!)

udah ah, ga mo mikirin lg, sesampenya di hotel yg baru, dinner mc donalds (untung ada yg deket, hmmm enaaak hot chocolate-nya ...!) ... off to beds ...!

Jalan2 ke Amrik (day 2)

bangunnya sih pagi ... kan niatnya mo ke tempat conference-nya pagi2 ... jadi bisa liat2 suasana ... trus after breakfast (hotelnya 'homy' banget!), mikir2 lagi, eh, conference opening-nya kan sore ya, kok pake ke sana pagi2 segala? mana presentasi blm bikin lagi, kata my colleague, akhirnya ya udahlah, sambil bikin presentasi, nunggu sorean aja ke tempat conference-nya, sambil takut ga bisa registrasi pagi2 ... trus baliklah ke kamar ... ngerjain presentasi beberapa menit, sisanya? tiduuurrr ...

bangun2 udah jam 3 sore ... gile, ga kerasa ... mungkin ini yg namanya jet lag ya? akhirnya buru2 siap2, jalan lagi lah kita ke tempat conference ... tapi ga jalan kaki deng, soalnya udah nanya2 rute bis ama resepsionis, jadi memutuskan utk naik bis aja sekarang ... (jauh bo kalo jalan) ...

sampe di tempat conference (walaupun salah nyetop bisnya, ya ... maklumlah, orang baru) ... registrasi ... pembukaan ... hmmm, cukup ok ... yaa anything feels good but maybe because this is the first time, i don't know ... setelah pidato2 singkat, ada heavy hors d'oeuvres ... haha, lieur macana ... lumayan ... soalnya td siang ga makan ... ada mac & cheese ... variety of salads ... tentunya boos juga ada dong ... lumayanlah ngeganjel ...

abis itu, pulang deh ... jalan dulu ke stanplat bis, nungguin 45 menitan buat yg ke arah hotel ... gile, dingin banget! padahal udah coat2an segala ... nyampe ke hotel, tidur ...

Jalan2 ke Amrik (day 1)

wuiihh ... first time to USA ...! fiuh ... sampe juga akhirnya di Nashville ... alhamdulillah ... setelah 24 jam flight ... dua jam jkt-singapore, 8 jam sing-tokyo, 12 jam tokyo-detroit, 2 jam detroit-nashville ... mana di singapore transitnya 5 jan-an lagi, gile, baru sekali itu tidur di mushola changi, untung bagus musholanya, pas bangun, badan pegel2 semua ... transit di airport yg lain2 sih paling 2 jam-an doang, jadi ga gitu kerasa nunggunya ...

udah gitu, ada kejadian memalukan lagi pas nyampe tokyo, masak sebelum landing, pake muntah2 segala! emang turbulence-nya kenceng banget sih ... hiiihhh ... untung ada miss IRM yg sigap dg kantong muntah, jadi bisa tertangani ... tengkyu ya, ceu, hehe ...

anyway, pas nyampe, celingak-celinguk bentar, (sambil kedinginan sih) akhirnya memutuskan naik shuttle dari airport ke hotel ... sampailah di hotel ... hmmm ... first impression, lumayan lah ... daripada lumayun kan ... eh tapi kok, teras luarnya nyambung ya? kayak yg di film2 itu? ah, sudahlah, udah terlalu capek mikirin fasilitas, langsung cabut lagi utk ngeliat2 keadaan sekeliling ...

maksudnya mencoba tracking jarak dari hotel tempat nginep ke hotel tempat conference ... eh taunya, jauh bow ...! ada kali setengah jam-an jalan ... tapi ya sdhlah, mau gimana lagi, udah terlanjur booking hotelnya di situ ...

abis ngecek tempat conference, balik lagi ke hotel, cari makan (alias beli makanan kaleng di hotel), tidur deh ... ga mikir apa2 lg ...